Abrupt Desire

He whispers in my ear to tear my clothes off as he rubs his hands down my torso and hips. Instant chills come through my body and nothing that happened before has my concern. I turn to face him as I lift my shirt and he pushes me against the wall. He cups my breasts while his lips move from mine to my neck while my hands are in his jeans. We said it was over, but his clothes on my floor revealed something more.

To be continued…

Forever Missed

Isn’t it kinda crazy that 2, 4, 7, 10 years ago, you were really close to someone, and as life happens you grew apart. Not because you wanted to. But as time passes, life changes who you are and who you spend your time with. A person who knew everything about you and in return you knew everything about them. Someone you called your best friend or maybe even someone you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with. This person who had an impact on your life that you will never forget.

I lost that person Friday.

I instantly felt sick to my stomach and even thought there was no way it could be true. A million different things running through my head. What happened? Like why hadn’t I kept in touch? How are her parents taking this? What about her daughter? Why did I not message her back to get together forever ago? Why ? Why ? Why ? 

I felt sick, sad, scared, regret, All of it. 

I found some courage to drive to her parents on this same day. I sat in my car for a long time trying to think of the right words to say.. There are no right words. I was nervous. Mainly because I knew once I knocked on the door it would be more real than ever. Walking in and seeing her mother in so much pain was one of the saddest moments of my life. I feel like there’s nothing you can ever do or say to help a person grieving, you just have to be there for them.

Phylicia was an absolute wonderful friend to me, she was always there for me. For the good and the bad. I loved her very much. I met her when I was 17. We were young and wild but had amazing times together.  She was there when my daughter was born. We continued to hang out but not as much. Life happened and we slowly drifted farther apart, just checking in on each other here and there. I am truly grateful for the memories she has given me, ones I will never forget.

Today Is her service. The day to say the hardest goodbye. She will be truly missed!